Saturday, March 15, 2008

Why do your boobies point at the floor?

I feel blessed and lucky to have girls. I don't have to worry about getting dressed in front of them will mess them up and they will talk about me later in therapy because they are unable- to-find- any- woman-attractive-that- does- not- have -stretch- marks- covering- half- their- body- like- his- mom-did.

Besides, girl babies are a luxury in my husbands family. There are 16 grandchildren, and 4 girls total.

I own 2 of them.
Ne'ner ne'ner.

But there are times when all this is not so great. Hubby doesn't have to participate in any talks about the tampons, why all women hate men 5-7 days out of the month, or how the baby gets out.

He also doesn't have to explain Newton's Law of Gravity.

Thing2: "Mommy, how come you wear that?"

Me: "So mommy's boobs stay out from under her armpits."

Thing2: "They don't go under your armpits mommy."

Me: "They do when I take this Victorian torture device off, honey. "

Thing2, pointing: "The brown things look like eyeballs mommy."

Me: "They are nipples."

Thing2: "But they look like eyeballs." Still pointing. "One is looking at me and the other is looking at the floor. "

She thought this was so funny that she laughed until she rolled off the bed.

She got a kick out of it. I got a complex.

3 comments:

Carol Van Rooy said...

I swear, I only looked at you r blog the other day and since then you've gone post crazy.

Love your tell-it as you see it kind of style.

I recently had to go through the period talk with my 11 yr old. I think I was more flustered than her. I guess it just goes to show how quickly our kids are growing up.

BusyMama Kellie said...

That was hysterical! Unfortunately I can't relate. My kids sucked all the life out of what boobs I had so instead of pointing to the floor, they have gone into seclusion, never to be seen again. Sigh...

Busymama Karen said...

3 kids later my boobs are more like wilted flowers.

Try explaining to a 5 year old after he has barged into the bathroom what that thing floating in the toilet is (tampon)! I was speechless. DH, says I should have told him it was just some trash.