Thursday, March 27, 2008

Men and kids... they alright I guess.

Kids are um.. alright.I know these things. I have two of them and any Mama that is the sole provider for their kids knows this too.

I sit near some people in my lovely Biology class that have none. The are still dumb. They do not realize that children can be highly over-rated.
We watched a very interesting movie in Biology today.The very incredibly stupid educational reproductive video.

Now, I realize that it has some educational information about cellular meiosis and the like, but really, anyone over the age of 12 already knows how the baby gets out. Not sure why they felt the need to include a very pregnant woman with a very obvious epidural,joyfully giving birth.It was also made in the 70's and the woman had yet to claim her feminism and take a razor to that forest.

I didn't want to watch my children make their F$#king painful wondrous way in to the world. I believe I threatened anyone that got a mirror or camera close my goodies. I certainly did not want to watch Sasquatch deliver hers. To make matters worse, the b^*ch got a epidural and made it all look as if small cantaloupes regularly flew out of her orifices. Or heck, it was the 70's ,maybe they did.

However, it was fun to watch the 18-21 year old boys turn green. That made it all worth it.

Now, here are some educational things I learned today:

Men cannot even make sperm cells with out the help from other cells, called Nanny cells, to take care of them. Proof that men can not even make their own sperm with out something taking care of them.

Getting the sperm to the egg is not possible without the woman, and not for the obvious reasons smart ass, because the sperm are slow and wont ask for directions! So we females have to go out of our way to produce a special sauce a special enzyme that the sperm can swim through to find the egg. Further proof the human race would die without us.

If we could just figure out a way to make our own sperm, we could be asexual. Then we would also have to find a way to kill our own spiders (eww!) and open jars (and risk my manicure?!)and never get a to see hot, sweaty muscles.

Hubs sure is lucky I married him for his

BTW, I now know EXACTLY how sperm is made. I am not so eager to have it near me now...


A Lost Writer said...

LOL!!!! not just plain ol' LOL...this was ROTF LOL. Perked up my afternoon BIG TIME. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Love the bit about the boys going green. They probably won't be so keen on going forth and multiplying now, will they?